Zilla of the Resistance and Friends

Dispatch from the #LymeDisease Wasteland

Regular readers know that I have been fighting to reclaim my life from advanced late stage Lyme and other tick diseases since last spring when, after years of suffering, weird symptoms and wrong diagnoses, they finally figured out that all of those times I had been bitten and infected by ticks is probably what had me still all messed up and worsening for so very long. I wrote about that HERE. It’s hard to find proper medical care due to bad politics surrounding this illness, as I wrote about in detail HERE. As is often the case with people who have this complex of diseases, I am not getting better on oral medications only, in fact I am deteriorating.

The pain from inside my bones is indescribable, persistent, and excruciating, and the pins and needles constant tingling in my hands, and arms, and feet is maddening as is the numbness of my toes, but what is really scary are the brain problems, I have so much trouble with my memory lately and it’s getting worse, I have trouble concentrating on anything for more than a minute or two, and a myriad of other weird and painful things happening, and I hate it.

There are limits to what oral medications can do in a body that is filled with pathogens that had years to embed themselves into hard to reach places, and there are places where medicine from pills just can’t reach. So the next step for me to fight the disease is IV treatment, which people who’ve been through this have seen good results from, but I would need to go to my Dr.’s office daily for at least a month to get it and probably longer because I have been ill for so very long, and the place is fifty miles away. I don’t know how I’d even pay for the gasoline to get there and I don’t think I am physically up to that level of travel while so sick and then to be enduring what is similar to chemotherapy while doing it. So I will ask if there is a way to get it done closer to home or a way that I can do it from home, but I still need to get there this weekend for my appointment and I don’t even know how I’m going to pay for the gas to do it, and I am not looking forward to that long damned drive while so very sick.

You may have noticed that most of the new posts here have not been written by me, and now you know why. I spend most of my time lately hurting and in bed, or just losing track of time in a brain fog that refuses to lift. I can’t stand living like this and really just want to put this misery behind me, but here at the bottom very little light reaches. I don’t know if I am up for this fight, but I do know that I won’t be able to even fight at all without help, and prayers, lots of prayers.

 

 

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